Thank you for coming to the ChengDu Real Estate Autumn Fair. Your choice to spend your national holiday week perusing forthcoming condo developments is a testament to your elite social class and sophisticated cultural tastes. I see that you have found your way to the 4 th floor, top-quality housing name brands.
What am I doing inside of this elegant glass room in my bathrobe? Well I'm glad you've asked, or rather written it on the glass in broken English using one of the provided dry-erase markers. You see, this is the home of the future, a miracle of advanced technology and design. That's why I have a robotic vacuum cleaner and a beanbag chair in here.
I'm writing something on the glass now, pretty amazing huh? You might want to aggressively push through to the crowd to get a closer look at it. That's right, it says "hello" in Chinese. I am quite the phenom.
What else is that written on my side of the glass? Why that must be a response to an earlier question. I guess I was explaining the benefits of our gesture-activated climate, lighting and audio control system in a moment of spontaneity. As you can see I find it amazingly convenient and fashionable. Could I demonstrate the system right now by using it to turn off a light? No. But by gesturing to this projection of an ipod control-wheel you should be able to get the gist of it.
You want to take my picture? Feel free! Would you prefer the peace sign or the thumbs up? Squat down, pull up the sleeve and flex my muscle next to your girlfriend while she stands in front of the glass? No problem, smile included. Need to take another one, go right ahead, that flash usually bounces off the glass.
You've brought your son along with you, splendid. I'm sure he'll be fascinated to learn about our low waterflow toilets. I see that your little emperor has drawn a caricature of me on the glass—a striking likeness. If you have any candy or small change, please encourage him to try and throw it through the top of my glass enclosure. If possible, I will catch it in my mouth.
Question? Yes. Where do I coming from? Well, technically I live in the future, but originally I'm from the states. I'm sorry, I didn't get that last part, I have a hard time reading cursive backwards, maybe you could just write it in Chinese for me. Oh, the woman on the screen now, yes that it my girlfriend. Of course she can see me! How else would she know to hold her wine glass up to the screen when I am holding my wine glass up to the screen? But not you. She can't see you. So don't try to catch her attention or that of my friends while we are playing rock/paper/scissors. How does the communication technology work? Great question. Its kind of like the internet, kind of like TV, who knows for sure. It's definitely not just an LCD projector playing prerecorded footage, though. Oh, we're back to the windows menu now, whoops. Boss, can you throw on the video that teaches me magic? Great. Now where are my red foam balls?
Ah, you there, with the combover and the bad teeth. Thank you for drawing my attention back to you. A few loud knocks on the glass usually does the trick.
You would like my phone number. Well, why the hell not. Please feel free to call me immediately after saving it in your phone and continuously for the next 24 to 36 hours. If I don't answer the first six or seven times don't be dissuaded. Let's keep in touch. Maybe I can come and visit you in your glass house sometime in the future.
What am I doing inside of this elegant glass room in my bathrobe? Well I'm glad you've asked, or rather written it on the glass in broken English using one of the provided dry-erase markers. You see, this is the home of the future, a miracle of advanced technology and design. That's why I have a robotic vacuum cleaner and a beanbag chair in here.
I'm writing something on the glass now, pretty amazing huh? You might want to aggressively push through to the crowd to get a closer look at it. That's right, it says "hello" in Chinese. I am quite the phenom.
What else is that written on my side of the glass? Why that must be a response to an earlier question. I guess I was explaining the benefits of our gesture-activated climate, lighting and audio control system in a moment of spontaneity. As you can see I find it amazingly convenient and fashionable. Could I demonstrate the system right now by using it to turn off a light? No. But by gesturing to this projection of an ipod control-wheel you should be able to get the gist of it.
You want to take my picture? Feel free! Would you prefer the peace sign or the thumbs up? Squat down, pull up the sleeve and flex my muscle next to your girlfriend while she stands in front of the glass? No problem, smile included. Need to take another one, go right ahead, that flash usually bounces off the glass.
You've brought your son along with you, splendid. I'm sure he'll be fascinated to learn about our low waterflow toilets. I see that your little emperor has drawn a caricature of me on the glass—a striking likeness. If you have any candy or small change, please encourage him to try and throw it through the top of my glass enclosure. If possible, I will catch it in my mouth.
Question? Yes. Where do I coming from? Well, technically I live in the future, but originally I'm from the states. I'm sorry, I didn't get that last part, I have a hard time reading cursive backwards, maybe you could just write it in Chinese for me. Oh, the woman on the screen now, yes that it my girlfriend. Of course she can see me! How else would she know to hold her wine glass up to the screen when I am holding my wine glass up to the screen? But not you. She can't see you. So don't try to catch her attention or that of my friends while we are playing rock/paper/scissors. How does the communication technology work? Great question. Its kind of like the internet, kind of like TV, who knows for sure. It's definitely not just an LCD projector playing prerecorded footage, though. Oh, we're back to the windows menu now, whoops. Boss, can you throw on the video that teaches me magic? Great. Now where are my red foam balls?
Ah, you there, with the combover and the bad teeth. Thank you for drawing my attention back to you. A few loud knocks on the glass usually does the trick.
You would like my phone number. Well, why the hell not. Please feel free to call me immediately after saving it in your phone and continuously for the next 24 to 36 hours. If I don't answer the first six or seven times don't be dissuaded. Let's keep in touch. Maybe I can come and visit you in your glass house sometime in the future.
0 comments:
Post a Comment